Friday Fracas

Allie: Hey Maxie, want to know something?

Gentlemen always let ladies go first.

So get out of the box so I can sit in it.
It's the gentlemanly thing to do.

Maxwell: Ow! Quit punching me in the face, Allie!

Allie: *through gritted teeth*
Well I wouldn't HAVE to Maxie if you'd just get out.

Maxwell: Nah, I think I'm good with rude today.

***

Better Move Along, Now.

Faraday: Hey, Allie! Lookit!
I'm outside and you're inside for a change.

Faraday: That's just totes coolio, innit? 
... uh, Allie? Are you, like, growling an' stuffs?

*cue unprintable epithets*
(oh yeah, and baleful glare)

Faraday: *gulp* Well, if you feel that way about it, I'll just move along, then ....

We think that might be a good idea, dood ....

***

Tonkinese in Trouble. Again.

*slow creep forward*

*Quiet crouch. VERY quiet.*

*slowly reaches up to sniff-- *

Allie: Were you sniffing my butt, Faraday???

Faraday: Who, me? Nope. Not at all. Nowhere near you.
Just sitting here minding my own business an' stuffs, Allie. Seriouslies.

Allie: Well, you just be sure your business stays away from mine, understood?
And when I say away, I mean far, FAR away.

Allie: *leans in to whisper quietly into Faraday's ear*
Do I make myself clear?

Faraday: *gulp* Crystals, and stuffs, Allie.

... moments later ...

Faraday: What? She never said anything about smelling where her butt was ....

*sigh-h-h* Boys.

***

 

Tonkinese Trouble

(we join our story, already in progress)

Maxwell: you called me a what?!?
Allie: Oh Brat, you really shouldn't have ....

Maxwell: *growls* Somekitty needs to learn you some manners, boy.
*cue scruffing action*

Allie: If I were you, I'd apologize, Brat.
He can hold that scruff all day if he has to.

Faraday: Awright. AWRIIIIGHT.
I'm SORRY already.
Leggo, Maxie!

(moments later)
Faraday: #sorrynotsorry

Maxwell: I HEARD that. 

***

WIDE LOAD.

Maxwell: *hides head in paw*

Tell me you did not say that to her, dood.

Have you no sense of self-preservation?

Evidently not.

Is that steam we see coming out Allie's ears?

Any takers on what's
about to happen in 3...2... ?

And on Endangered Species Day, no less.
(who knew Faraday would end up on that list?)

***

 

Bratty Brothers

Faraday: You're in my spot, Allie.

Allie: I didn't see a "Reserved" sign, Brat. This is a public scratching post.
Faraday: I've got your "Reserved" sign, right here!

Allie: You want a piece of this? Well, do you, Brat?

(Uh-oh, we don't think this is the response Allie was expecting ....)

(Nope. Not at all.)

Allie: FINE. Have it your way. Just don't leave any stink on it when you're done.
Faraday: You saying I SMELL, Allie? Huh?!?

Poor Allie. Somekitty's having a Very Bad Day.

***

While You Were Out: PeeMail #224

When Dad's in charge while Mom's in Phoenix ....

***

Personal Space

Allie: Oooh you lovely little mous--

Allie: Did you need something, Faraday?
Faraday: No ... I'm just sitting here.
Allie: Well, go sit somewhere else so I can enjoy my mousie in private.

~ later that day ~

Allie: Oooh you lovely feather wan--

Allie: I can hear you breathing, Brat. Don't you have something better to do?
Faraday: Not really.

 (pause)

Allie: You're not going to leave, are you, Brat.
Faraday: Nuh-uh.

Allie:  *sigh-h-h-h*  You do know how to ruin the moment.
Faraday: Does that mean you're done with the feathers now?

***

Wordless Wednesday

Wonder what will happen next?

***

Does Not Play Well With Others

Allie: Hey, Brat. When are you going to be done with that snake?
There are other cats in the household who would like a turn, you know....

Faraday: Hmmm, let me think on that for a second...

Faraday: M-m-m-m yeah ...  that would be NEVER.

*chomp!*

Allie: *sigh* I should have seen that one coming ....

 ***

Never call a girlcat WINDBAG.

Faraday: Mommy said yesterday was Big Wind Day.

I asked Maxie why Allie got a special day named after her.
 She's just a big windbag after all....

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Heard it all before, Allie. Seriouslies...."

An' HE said it wasn't about Allie at all.

  "Observed each year in the United States on April 12th, National Big Wind Day, commemorates the recording of the highest natural wind gust measured on the Earth’s surface. On the afternoon of April 12, 1934, the Mount Washington Observatory recorded winds at 231 miles per hour."

Seriouslies, who KNEW?

An' in case anyone doubts me, just take a look at all Allie's texts yesterday!
She went ON and ON and ON ... Good thing our dad has unlimited minutes with his plan, cuz she just used up elebenty billion of them!

***

Awkward Moments

Allie: Oooh, you lovely, lovely pink toy, you!

I could just rub on you and roll with you all da--

 *cue heavy breathing*

Maxwell: Don't mind me, Allie. I'm just, uh, you know - living vicariously through you.
Because that toy looks so amazing and all. Go ahead. I won't bother you.

Allie: Maxie, you do know how to ruin the mood.

Maxwell: Does that mean you're done with it?

Because, like, if you are and stuff....

Happy Awkward Moments Day!

(yeah, it's a thing.) 

***

Turtle Surfing

I unnerstand everyone needs a hobby and stuffs...

Going around surfing on kitties may sound totally rad and really edgy for a catnip turtle and all.

Let's just say Maxie's like a green slope, or a bunny hill. But seriouslies...

 You think you're ready for the double black diamond???

Let me remind you that you're taking your life in your own, uh, fins when engaging in such a rigorous sport.

 Just remember to sign the waiver before you go.

***
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