Funny But No

Faraday totally doesn't get why this was rejected.
Maybe it's because he identifies so well with the card...?

 *** 

_____

Toon Tuesdays feature animal (and sometimes human) humor created by the peeps over at Shoebox Greetings (a tiny little division of Hallmark) - where our mom works, too!

Consensus?

Oh, this bodes. All three, in proximity. On purpose.

"We've taken a vote, Mommy, and it's unanimous.
You're not allowed to go on vacation again. Ever."

*** 

Faraday's Orchard Projectiles

Faraday: I was out strolling in the garden the other day--
Maxwell: dood, you were NOT. You did a door-dash and Momma ran after you.

Faraday: (dismissively) Whatevs.

As is was saying... I was out in the garden - the orchard, actually - and I noticed Daddy's trees had tons of these ginormous green things on them! I had to go investigate.

Maxwell: dood, first off, the "orchard" is two trees in the side yard. And secondly, the only reason you can show off that you were outside is because Momma grabbed the camera on the way out the door to shove you back inside!

Faraday: Seriouslies, Maxie, you're throwing off my rhythm here.

I was about to show off all the stuff in those trees. Believe me, you don't want to nom on any grass under them - those things are projectiles! They keep falling on you!  (rubs noggin)

Maxwell: I've been watching what Papa does with them. He's been doing something on the stove....

Allie: Mother says it's pear butter. And weren't they surprised to arrive at their B&B in Mendocino last weekend to find the very same, home-grown, homemade dish!

Mendocino Farmhouse breakfast nook (pear butter just below frame, sorry :-)

Allie: Mother's working on her photos from that trip and we asked if we could share a few of them sometime soon - if you're interested?

Maxwell: Back to those pear things. Even though there's no tuna in it, whatever papa's doing sure makes the house smell gooood.  M-m-m-m-m....

*drool coma*

Almost as good as those thingies Momma was making for the High Holy Days.
Fruit challahs. A lot of you saw our post on Facebook, for those of you who didn't, here they are:

Front: Apple-raisin Challah, Upper L: Mexican Chocolate, Upper-R: Apple Cream Cheese Challah

Faraday: *grumbles* I still think a Bonito Flake challah woulda tasted better.

Sunday's Shelter Sweetie: France

"Bonjour! Hello!
I'm France, a sweet little year and a half old tortie-point snowshoe girl.
I came in with Italy, my sister. You met her a few days ago."

"I am really sweet, if a tiny bit shy. But I warm up quickly, and just looove to ronrons-- uh, I mean purr for you!

Won't you come meet me? They say France is the place to fall in love - and right now, the place where I'm living is having a "Fall in Love" shelter special. You can come make me yours for only $30 of your American dollars.

What a deal, oui?

Let's start our "forever" together, this weekend!

Ronrons,
France"

France is available for adoption today at the Independence Campus of Great Plains SPCA.

Cat Art Hop: Eye of the Beholder

Sometimes the most beautiful art is simply captured through the lens of a camera.

Or maybe we should say the most beautiful art is the creation you see before you.
I find Faraday's eyes to be mesmerizing. And I love the way they look, close up, viewed from the side.

For more cat art, join the Hop at Athena's blog!

Friday's Fashion Faux Paws

Episode "Paper, or...?"

Allie: Brace yourselves. 

Today's post is - well - it's rather shocking, I know.

Every fashionable feline understands that a proper meal is to be served on a dish commensurate to one's tastes.

Yet while Mother stole Father away last weekend, what appeared before my very eyes?

That's right, Gentle Readers. Paper. Our human brother served me on a common paper plate.

Maxwell: Uhhh, Allie. At least it was a Hallmark --
Allie: *sighhh* Oh Maxie. Sometimes brothers are best seen and not heard. 
Maxwell: But it was silver and everyth--
Allie: Maxwell, please have the good sense to stop talking now and let someone with style and taste make the judgement call on this, hmmm?

As I was saying... common paper, as opposed to the antique crystal platter I am accustomed to dining on.

Allie: Case in point. Elegant, classic, understated. And it complements me perfectly.

At least Jen, the cat sitter, had the good sense to serve me properly. I can see she has potential, Mother. At least you did something right.

***

#LightForPets & Shelter Double-Header

Since someone went AWOL on Sunday *looks meaningfully at Mommy* we missed our regularly scheduled Shelter Sweetie. And yesterday's post for Wednesday's Waif, too.

But that's okay, because today is the perfect day to rectify that.

Today we join with the Helen Woodward Center - and all participating shelters across the U.S. - for Remember Me Thursday. The aim is to shed light on the plight of those animals in shelters still in need of a home.

According to the Helen Woodward Animal Center, only 30% of American households claim rescue animals for a pet. That's shamefully low! And this accounts, in part, for the 3.4 million pets euthanized annually here in America.

So today, we join in lighting a candle (virtually for us, but you can check for participating shelters in your area at this link here) in honor of those homeless pets.

And we wish to shed a light today on two such animals in need right here in our backyard.

Up first, this week's Shelter Sweetie from Great Plains SPCA in Independence:

"Ciao, amici! Hello friends!
My name is Italy. (Betcha couldn't tell, huh?)
I'm a lovely little siamese mix girl just waiting to purr her way into your heart.
Be warned! I'm a real charmer!"

 "The staff here at Great Plains love to pet me and call me Mia Bella, "my beauty." That's so sweet of them, don't you think? So when they pet me, I purr up a storm!

I'd love to purr for you, too. Won't you come meet me?

Ciao for now,
Italy"

Italy is available at the Independence Missouri Campus of Great Plains SPCA. 

  ***

Next, our Wednesday's Waif from Wayside Waifs in Kansas City is a Super Double Top Secret girl.

Any fan of the TV show NCIS will instantly recognize Zivah, that show's stunningly gorgeous Mossad agent. Our Zivah's equally captivating, don't you think?

Zivah is a long-haired tortie girl who is affectionate and loves attention.
She's ready to come celebrate the High Holy Days with you, today!"

Come meet her at Allie's Alma Mater, Wayside Waifs!

***

Wishing you ...

Rosh Hashana begins tonight at sunset.

***

Wordless Wednesday

'Toon Tuesdays

Identity Crisis doodle?
Only the Shoebox artist knows - and she's not talkin'.

 *** 

_____

Toon Tuesdays feature animal (and sometimes human) humor created by the peeps over at Shoebox Greetings (a tiny little division of Hallmark) - where our mom works, too!

Lounger Wars, Episode 1.

So a few weeks ago we won this pawesome Peach Industries kitty lounger (one for us and one for a shelter) over at Pricilla's blog.

Little did we know this had the power to turn mild-mannered Maxwell into Territorial Hoarder Kitty!

B-b-but momma, it was clearly for me. It matches my eyes and everything...!


Why yes, yes it does. But since when do you refuse to share, Maxie?

 Allie: That looks really comfortable, Maxie. Mind if I give it a try?

Maxwell: Come no further, Allie. Or I won't be responsible for my actions.

 
Allie: Oh please, Maxie. You can stop it with the dramatics. No one's buying it.

I mean, really.  You?!?

Allie: Now move over!

Maxwell: I warned you!
*whap!* *ka-pow!*

*gaaaaaargh!*

(see what we mean? This Peach Industries' Lounger has turned him into a ...a...hoarder!)

How will this tale end, gentle readers?
Will Allie ever get her turn on the Lounger?
Will Maxwell turn into the Kitty of Doom... permanently?

You'll have to wait to find out until the next installment of Lounger Wars!

***

Abandoned: Day 4

So Mommy has gone AWOL. She grabbed Daddy & ran away for a short "vacation."

We have a new cat sitter staying with us on the days our human brother can't be here all day. And we promised to report in daily.

DAY 4:

Abandoned: Day 3

So Mommy has gone AWOL. She grabbed Daddy & ran away for a short "vacation."

We have a new cat sitter staying with us on the days our human brother can't be here all day. And we promised to report in daily.

DAY 3:

Abandoned: Day 2

So Mommy has gone AWOL. She grabbed Daddy & ran away for a short "vacation."

We have a new cat sitter staying with us on the days our human brother can't be here all day. And we promised to report in daily.

DAY 2:

Abandoned: Day 1

So Mommy has gone AWOL. She grabbed Daddy & ran away for a short "vacation."

We have a new cat sitter staying with us on the days our human brother can't be here all day.
(ya don't think she snores or anything, do ya, Maxie???)

We told Mommy we were gonna email her daily status updates!

DAY 1:

Pole dance, anyone?

Allie: Well, hello, brat. Are you here to watch me rehearse my pole dance?

Faraday: *rapidly backs away* Eww. That would scar my virgin eyes, like, forever.

Faraday: Mommy? Do something? Pleeeease...?

Allie: Silly boy.

I meant this pole - the cat scratcher I've been wanting for ages. (I think it'd look fabulous in hot pink, don't you?)

Of course, I'm not a girl to look a gift horse in the mouth.

If it chases Faraday away, I think I've officially taken up a new hobby.

***
 

FTC Disclaimer: This post was written in collaboration with SwellPets, and we were compensated to share the link to their cat scratcher. But we wouldn't have shared it if we didn't think owning cat scratchers like this are a positive and important alternative to declawing, a practice which we strongly oppose. 
Every post of this kind on A Tonk's Tail reflects our honest and unbiased opinions. Swell Pets is not responsible for the content of this article.

Do you MIND...?

Seriouslies.
What's a kitty gotta to do get some privacy around here anyways?!?

Hrmpf.

***

Wednesday's Waif: Lucy Clawless!

"Wouldn't it be cool if a statue of a majestic Egyptian cat could come to life?
Well, it did!

I'm Lucy Clawless, a stunning brown and black tabby with long, graceful limbs, gorgeous golden eyes and just about the most regal, classically beautiful cat face ever. I'm also front-declawed, hence my name."

Here I am, hanging out with Staff Gal Jen - her lap is comfy, but I'd sure like my very own!

"Well, that, and I also look like a warrior princess. See, this is me, looking fierce.
Grrrrr!  How'd I do?

"I was found wandering the streets of Grandview as a stray. Can you believe that? Being declawed, I obviously was someone's pet before, but I'm unable to put my life's story into human words, so the folks at Wayside don't know much else about my past.

One thing they have discovered about me: I stress out easily, so I need a calm, quiet, adults-only home.

"Can we play Peekaboo without the "boo" part? I'm not really fond of unexpected surprises.
But I have the "Peek" part down - can you tell?"

"People here at Wayside say I'm a friendly, talkative cat who loves attention.
I'm also very smart, and I enjoy playing kitty games on the iPad.

My Felineality is Executive. That means I'm a moderately brave, intelligent, independent cat. And currently, I'm doing an outstanding job snoopervising Wayside staff member, Jen.

She says not to worry about me. I have "stranger-danger" fears at first, but once I get to know you, I'm fun to be around!

I'm hanging out in her office - come by and say hello!

If you have a low-stress household and would like to add a sleek, smart, stunning feline friend, please come to Wayside and meet me, Lucy Clawless!

Love, Lucy C"

Lucy's available at Allie's Alma Mater, Wayside Waifs.

'Toon Tuesdays

When double dog dares aren't enough.

 *** 

_____

Toon Tuesdays feature animal (and sometimes human) humor created by the peeps over at Shoebox Greetings (a tiny little division of Hallmark) - where our mom works, too!

Svelte & looking mighty fine.

Hello there! Allie here, reporting in from high atop the cat tree.

I have news for you - big news!

Well, I suppose technically it would be called "smaller" news, being that this post is all about weight loss and promoting a healthy lifestyle!

That's right: I've been on a months-long journey to a skinnier me: #TeamAllie, working on my Extreme Feline Makeover!

And if I do say so myself, it's been a tasty journey, what with all the delish grain-free canned food my #TeamAllie sponsor, Merrick Purrfect Bistro, has provided.

You could say I've been "eating myself thin!"  *giggle!*

Mother believes strongly in feeding a species-appropriate diet, and for her that means grain-free goodness, with quality ingredients and appropriate portion sizes (I'm right there with her...except maybe on those portions. Let's talk, Mother, 'k?)

Of course, we all know that an important component to a healthy kitty's lifestyle is getting appropriate exercise, and I've been logging plenty of arm reaches by doing spider wand toy reps every day. Pardon my expression - I'm really intent on perfecting my form!

Of course, since I've started down the Road to Svelte, a certain bratty brother has decided he, too, loves taste sensations like Turkey Pate and Beef Wellington.

I've had to hire Maxwell as my very own personal Brinks' Security Guard, so Faraday stays away from my food!

Faraday: yeah, yeah, blah blah blah. 

Let's get down to brass tacks, here, sis. Did you or did you not lose weight this month? 

The scales don't lie!

***drum roll*** 

This month's weigh-in?  12.2 pounds, down more than a half pound in the past 4 weeks!

This glam girl's looking good, and she knows it. Betcha couldn't tell, could you?

Allie: Oh Mother-r-r-r... my driver's license is now wrong. Can I get a new one?

***

FTC Disclosure: 

Our Extreme Feline Makeover series is sponsored by Merrick Pet Care, and we have received both food and a small fee to compensate us for each post. This covers the time it takes to take photos and write our progress reports.
Every sponsored post on A Tonk's Tail will always reflect our honest and unbiased opinions. Merrick Pet Care is not responsible for the content of this article, and Purrfect Bistro flavors are not specifically formulated for weight management.
This effort is part of an overall health and wellness regime for Allie.